You pick up what you can from whatever sources you can.
The internet started to become big and I got into political forums.
One time someone said to me that when my life goes to hell, and it will, be man enough to lay in it, the pile of shit you created,* oh, the bed you’ve made, that was it. Something like that. While uncalled-for, there is probably some wisdom in there somewhere. Something I never heard from my father who died while I was a baby or I surely would have heard that from him.
We live in the world we live in, not the world we’d like to live in. I didn’t create the rules and I may not like them but I have to follow them, at least to a point. I can’t just rebel against anything and everything and expect to get by.
It became harder to get help from my mom, especially when her boyfriend moved in. Perhaps it was his influence on her a little bit; his more conservative influence. In the long-run I took what I could from that and learned to be more self-reliant and not to have my first thought be to ask my mother for help. Long over-due no doubt when this happened.
So life’s hard lessons come and go and you take from them what you can, life goes on and you learn. You may not learn things in the prescribed way, like me, but you can pick them up in the course of time wherever you can find them, leaving no stone un-turned. You learn what you can.